Sunday, May 27, 2007
I am in leeds to watch england v west indies. It rained instead. So we have been drinking. Some since 09:00. We have now just experienced our first casualties. Man down!
Flickr
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Here's a top tip for all you cyclists who like a beer.
Don't go to the pub after work, lock your bike to a lampost opposite the pub and leave the keys in the lock.
Yep, you've guessed it. I did this.
From within the Wig & Pen I couldn't see my bike. What I did see out the window whilst enjoying an Amstel with Mark and Ryan was a trio of what the Arctic Monkeys would call 'dirty little herberts'. One of them (he appeared to be the alpha male as his Adidas baseball cap was newer than the others) appeared to be communicating with someone out of my field of vision and then pointing at the pub.
Like a coiled spring I leapt from my seat and ran outside the pub. And there he was. An apparent scoundrel fiddling with my bike lock (that at this point I believed was secured as normal). Clearly surprised at my commando-like frame hurtling towards him, he proffered up the excuse that I'd left the keys in the lock and he was going to bring them into pub and find me. He then handed me the keys and scurried off.
On re-entering the pub, all eyes were on me. Apparently, everyone had heard me utter "Whoa!" quite loud and then seen me sprint out the pub.
The benefit of the doubt says I should believe the man I confronted. But I'm dubious. Frankly, he looked like the kind of bloke who would have flogged it for his next hit. And I'm also curious as to why, if he was just going to hand the keys in, did his three mates not wait for him. Was he going to meet them up later after trading my bike? And many other people had walked past and felt no need to fiddle with the lock... I may be cynical, and it would ultimately have been my fault, but I am suspicious of his intentions.
Still, all's well that ends well. I've got my bike, my keys, had a bit of a fright and was able to finish my pint. But I'm still undecided as to this individual's intentions. Maybe I shouldn't judge a book by the cover?
Sunday, May 13, 2007
It's not often I'm up this late (02:15). But Jane's in Florence so some of the boys have been round for poker. I lost. Not to worry.
Before going to bed, I thought I'd polish off a scotch and watch ten minutes of TV. There's nothing on, so as is often the case, I switched to one of the music channels.
Do you know what they do at this time on a Saturday? It's genius - they 'sign' all the videos. I've just watched a 50 Cent video being 'signed' by a middle-aged woman. I'm sure it's a valued service to the hard of hearing, but to me it's the funniest thing I've seen in ages. Not the fact that there's signing, let's be clear on that, but the fact that the signers (and the person doing the signing changes each video) are almost exclusively the kind of people you'd never associate with the type of video they're signing. And they do dance.
I thought it was a joke at first, but it's happening on multiple channels! Currently, a 50 year old lady is bopping to the instrumental part of DJ Sammy's 'Girls of summer' waiting for the lyrics to start again. I may have done a little wee.
I've taken some pictures, I'll add them tomorrow.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
What a swizz! I've just got an Aero out the vending machine. Fifty pence down the drain. The last one I had was several years ago. This one is very, very much smaller. It could fall down the gap in the keyboard if I'm not careful.
And I've just checked to see how much they now weigh, and guess what, the weight of the bar is mysteriously not shown ANYWHERE on the packet. What a con. I've been able to ascertain from the calories in the nutrional value table and the proud boast of only 164 calories per bar that the bar weighs a staggering 31g. That's nowt. And I know it's nothing because I did the same calculation on a KitKat wrapper that's been on my desk for a while (the wrapper has won me another free bar from participating outlets), and a standard 4 finger 'Kat weighs 45g. It should also be noted that Nestle don't print the weight on KitKat's either anymore. I am going to write to them to find out why.
In the meantime, ignore Aeros. They're a con. End of.